Starscream Reviews Revenge of the Fallen
Jun. 25th, 2009 10:47 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I would firstly like to say that I was incredibly displeased with the first film, despite it alerting you pitiful organics to our marvelous glory. It was too many Autobots, not enough Decepticons and, most importantly, not enough me. And what little me there is looks like a giant chicken-monkey.
However, I am obliged to see the new film regardless, so I just wasted two hours of my life. I hope you are all happy.
First: why so much about the humans. No one cares about them! Especially not me! Sam is just another slagging Witwicky, the only difference is that he's occasionally funny and doesn't wear a yellow hardhat.
Second: WHY DID THEY BRING MEGATRON BACK HE SHOULD HAVE STAYED DEAD oh primus the Fallen whyyyy BUT ANYWAY MEGATRON SHOULD HAVE STAYED DEAD. I AM MORE THAN VILLAIN ENOUGH FOR THIS PIECE AND I AM NOT THE FALLEN'S BITCH.
Third: What. WHAT. I AM NOT THAT MUCH OF A COWARD 1 I WOULDN'T JUST STAND THERE AND TAKE IT LIKE THAT FROM MEGATRON2, FIGHT BACK, DIDN'T YOU RULE CYBERTRON IN THE COMICS ARrrrrrgh. AND I AM STILL A CHICKEN MONKEY?! WHAT IS THIS
Argh. NEEDS MORE ME. ME ME ME. In fact, slag Revenge of the Fallen, this should have been Starscream: The Movie.
Fourth: Once again, too many Autobots.
In conclusion: This is the most worthless film I have ever seen – wait, no, that was Viva Chihuahua Primus why did I see that oh right, free ticket even so and Michael Bay can shove it right up his actuator.
PS: HAHA, RAVAGE DIED AGAIN. Also, Soundwave, what were you doing to that satellite?! That was - I didn't need to see that.
1No, he totally is. – Ed.
2Yes, he would. – Ed.
However, I am obliged to see the new film regardless, so I just wasted two hours of my life. I hope you are all happy.
First: why so much about the humans. No one cares about them! Especially not me! Sam is just another slagging Witwicky, the only difference is that he's occasionally funny and doesn't wear a yellow hardhat.
Second: WHY DID THEY BRING MEGATRON BACK HE SHOULD HAVE STAYED DEAD oh primus the Fallen whyyyy BUT ANYWAY MEGATRON SHOULD HAVE STAYED DEAD. I AM MORE THAN VILLAIN ENOUGH FOR THIS PIECE AND I AM NOT THE FALLEN'S BITCH.
Third: What. WHAT. I AM NOT THAT MUCH OF A COWARD 1 I WOULDN'T JUST STAND THERE AND TAKE IT LIKE THAT FROM MEGATRON2, FIGHT BACK, DIDN'T YOU RULE CYBERTRON IN THE COMICS ARrrrrrgh. AND I AM STILL A CHICKEN MONKEY?! WHAT IS THIS
Argh. NEEDS MORE ME. ME ME ME. In fact, slag Revenge of the Fallen, this should have been Starscream: The Movie.
Fourth: Once again, too many Autobots.
In conclusion: This is the most worthless film I have ever seen – wait, no, that was Viva Chihuahua Primus why did I see that oh right, free ticket even so and Michael Bay can shove it right up his actuator.
PS: HAHA, RAVAGE DIED AGAIN. Also, Soundwave, what were you doing to that satellite?! That was - I didn't need to see that.
1No, he totally is. – Ed.
2Yes, he would. – Ed.
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Date: 2009-06-26 02:52 am (UTC)THAT IS ALL I WAS DOING.
THAT IS ALL.
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Date: 2009-06-26 02:55 am (UTC)This is my incredulous face, Soundwave.
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Date: 2009-06-26 02:58 am (UTC)YOUR STATUS: GETTING KICKED AROUND BY MEGATRON.
GETTING LAID: NICE ADDITION.no subject
Date: 2009-06-26 03:01 am (UTC)OH SLAG YOUno subject
Date: 2009-06-26 03:05 am (UTC)MY STATUS: STAY IN SPACE. RELAY INFORMATIVE. GET LAID. EXCELLENT MOVIE.no subject
Date: 2009-06-26 03:09 am (UTC)What about the part where Bumblebee rips out Ravage's spine?no subject
Date: 2009-06-26 03:13 am (UTC)...
WHY RAVAGE ALWAYS DIE ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!!!god he's so adorable in that icon I want to hug him
Date: 2009-06-26 03:14 am (UTC)i had too much fun drawing it. i was sort of proud of myself.
Date: 2009-06-26 03:16 am (UTC)I kind of want one of starscream covering his ears like ARRGH now just for these sorts of situations
Date: 2009-06-26 03:18 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-26 02:57 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-26 02:58 am (UTC)Okay, that's fair. My last line was actually not bad.
Pft. I think the human phrase is, "sucks to be you". I've had three movies now.
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Date: 2009-06-26 03:01 am (UTC)It might suck to be me, but at least I'll never have to work with Michael smegging Bay.
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Date: 2009-06-26 03:02 am (UTC)At least my vehicle mode is nice in this film.
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Date: 2009-06-26 03:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-26 03:09 am (UTC)[BRB, LOL'ING FOREVER]
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Date: 2009-06-26 03:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-26 03:11 am (UTC)Thing is, that'd probably save the film.
No wait.
They'd actually cast Adam Sandler.
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Date: 2009-06-26 03:13 am (UTC)Adam Sandler? Couldn't we at least get a person of colour to be the Cat? Bad enough they cast a white woman as the Cat in the American remake.
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Date: 2009-06-26 03:16 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-26 03:17 am (UTC)Adam Sandler? Yuck.
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Date: 2009-06-26 02:59 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-26 03:02 am (UTC)...
Not that I can talk, but at least mine was watchable.
And yes. I've had three.
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Date: 2009-06-26 03:05 am (UTC)Lucky you. Although at least I didn't look like a chicken monkey.
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Date: 2009-06-26 03:12 am (UTC)SLAG YOU MICHAEL BAYYYY
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Date: 2009-06-26 03:13 am (UTC)Also... What was Soundwave doing to that Satellite?
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Date: 2009-06-26 03:15 am (UTC)You really don't want to know.
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Date: 2009-06-26 03:16 am (UTC)I don't think I do either.
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Date: 2009-06-26 03:36 am (UTC)And no, you can't say I was one of those seven pathetic Primes that had an orgy to hide the alleged Matrix.no subject
Date: 2009-06-26 03:44 am (UTC)nope, pretty sure you were there,
novanemisis.[smirk]
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Date: 2009-06-26 03:51 am (UTC)At least I wasn't a giant metal triangle.At least I wasn't shown for long, even if I happened to be there.
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Date: 2009-06-26 04:21 am (UTC)OH SHUT ITno subject
Date: 2009-06-26 04:59 am (UTC)But there were enough fucking explosions in there to last me a fucking lifetime.
I fell asleep.
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Date: 2009-06-27 01:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-27 01:55 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-26 05:51 am (UTC)I kind of liked it?
but seriously, how often DO I die and come back?
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Date: 2009-06-26 09:31 pm (UTC)Though that really shouldn't surprise me.
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Date: 2009-06-27 01:35 am (UTC)Speaking of us, there's now two of us on Dear_Mun! One's from the comics, but still. Four of us! And all of them brilliant.
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Date: 2009-06-27 03:42 am (UTC)Well, that is something to be glad about.
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Date: 2009-06-27 01:23 am (UTC)...but Wazpinator feel inzect-bot ztuck in zame boat az Wazpinator.
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Date: 2009-06-27 01:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-27 03:44 am (UTC)Got wingz pulled off...